Crazy Day by Ben

Chole was riding on her shiny bicycle in the beautiful yellow sun. While she was going back home she saw a man holding up a sign saying, ‘ I’m desperate for money please help.’ Chole handed the man a 5 euro note “Hope this will help,” said Chole kindly. “This is all you got?” said the man greedily. “EXUSE ME, DONT DARE SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT!” warned Chole. Chole was now fuming after what she witnessed. Chole had told her Mam everything and her Mam was disgusted at what she heard. “That’s horrific!” explained her Mam. Now Chole couldn’t stop thinking about that for the rest of the day.

2 thoughts on “Crazy Day by Ben”

  1. Hi Ben,
    You use a lot of great descriptive words in your writing-“desperate,” kindly,” “greedily,” “fuming”-that help the reader connect with your story. 🙂

    Keep writing!
    Francine (Team 100)
    Twin Cities, Minnesota USA

  2. I have ran in to a homeless man who i gave 5 dollars
    I like this story
    I think you should add more adverbs
    What did your mom do after you told her

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